We live in an age when self-discovery is never ending.
(PHOTO: MICHELLE LOUISE BIRD)
I messed up a lot in 2015 and 2014 and 2013. With 30 quickly approached, I realized I needed to change my life before it changed me – forever.
Single, overweight, and starving for male attention – I started watching ABC’s hit reality series, The Bachelor, and experienced something akin to a religious awakening. I had three major epiphanies:
- The only way to scare rich independent women into competing for a man is the threat of a rose ceremony.
- The only way to make a positive change in your life is to call it a “journey.”
- The only way to find love is on TV.
Self-improvement is a road I’ve walked down many times, and every time it was totally fruitless and totally boring.
I turn 30 this year and pretty soon I’ll be too old for reality TV, unless they bring back Rock of Love (CAST ME). The fear that I would never be one of 29 women competing on national television for the love and validation of a total stranger, is palpable.
It’s time to get hot and find a man. Won’t you join my journey?